After the frightening shooting spree at Columbine High School in 1999, where bullying was considered to be a major cause of the actions of the two adolescents involved, attention was closely focused on this age-old problem. The raised awareness of the potentially devastating effects that bullying could have on children caused by this incident resulted in the development of anti-bullying programs in thousands of school districts. After almost seven years of this heightened awareness and social concern it would be expected that the problem would have virtually disappeared. Unfortunately the opposite is being found.
A combination of recent research with the anecdotal experiences of many therapists and social workers indicates that the incidence of bullying in schools is actually on the rise. This fact is causing considerable consternation among school authorities and parents alike. Although little action is yet being taken to determine what is going wrong, it appears to this author that the increase in bullying is a result of three factors.
The first is that the root causes of bullying are not being addressed. To be a bully a person must be both aggressive and have a hostile attitude towards life. They tend to perceive provocation everywhere, which allows them to justify their aggressiveness towards others. Whether these tendencies are born in children, for which there is some evidence, or developed from family stresses, the key people in preventing future bullying are the parents. They must recognize the aggressive tendencies in their children and take steps to curb them through a combination of disciplinary action and teaching more appropriate behavior. This is rarely happening.
Instead, when many parents are informed that their child has been involved in bullying behavior, they leap to the child’s defence. Many school administrators find themselves being attacked for daring to suggest that a child might be a bully. This occurs either because one or more of the parents is also a bully or through a mistaken belief that parents must support their children no matter what they do. The result is the reinforcement of the bullying behavior by the people who have the best chance to solve the problem.
The next problem is the incredible tolerance to violence that has become a hallmark of North American society. It is seen everywhere, including movies, video games, television and even in the toys that are being produced. The result has been the development of a virtual immunity to violence where bullying is not considered a serious problem. This attitude results in weak support for school anti-bullying campaigns, even among some school officials.
Finally, there is a problem within the schools themselves. While educational programs against bullying may be in effect, it is also necessary to employ disciplinary measures against bullying behaviors. Many schools trumpet their ‘zero tolerance’ policies, but fail to actually back them up. Whether this is because the administrators cannot stand up to aggressive parents or because these officials do not really believe in the necessity of the programs, the result is the same. It is vital that firm and immediate disciplinary action be taken when bullying is detected or reported if it is to be combated effectively. When this does not happen, the educational portions of the programs become futile.
The answers then are clear. Parents must not allow their children to be bullies. They need to talk to such children about the problems that bullying causes and discipline their children when they engage in this behavior. Parents must also raise their voices against the violence being presented in the media. They need to monitor what their children watch and what video games they play. They need to boycott violent entertainment and write letters to the networks and movie producers. Finally schools officials must have the courage of their convictions. They must not permit bullying behaviors within their schools and they cannot back down in the face of aggressive parents. Bullying can have devastating effects on children and its increase in incidence must not be allowed to continue.